Today is your day! Happy 6th(!) Birthday my dear, sweet, first-born baby boy.
On this day, six years ago it was a Monday. It was the day after Super Bowl. I distinctly remember watching all the SuperBowl commercials being aired again, and laughing so hard at a Tide commercial as I was in the middle of a contraction. I remember my doctor telling me at 9am that you would make your appearance by dinner time.
After an uneventful labor, and 3 hard pushes, you made your bright appearance on a dreary winter day, right before the hospital staff brought in my dinner tray.
Your dad and I thought you were just perfect and beautiful. As a matter of fact, we both looked at each other and said, “He’s so cute! And not just because he’s our baby cute, but legitimately cute!” You had such a calm, yet alert demeanor. You only cried when the nurse gave you your bath. And that first night in the hospital, you slept the whole night! You were born a good sleeper.
You were such an easy baby. You did everything right. You rolled, crawled and walked your way through every milestone with ease. Everyday your dad and I would say how blessed we were.
As you’ve grown and gotten bigger, so has your smile and personality. You love having fun and being goofy. But you can be quiet and thoughtful. You enjoy playing with your brother, cousins and friends, but you also enjoy your moments alone doing your own thing. You crave attention and love being front and center, but you get stage fright. You are strong, athletic and competitive. And you are oh, so creative. You’re an amazing Big Brother. You are just fun to be around. And I feel so blessed to be your mom.
Your 6th birthday marks my 6th anniversary of being a mom. Your mom. And Adam, by being your mom, you have taught me so much. About you. About life. And about me.
You have taught me that there is no greater sound than that of a giggling child. You have taught me there’s no bigger heartache than watching your baby suffer from a fever, or a scraped knee, or a booster shot, or hurt feelings.
You have taught me that without even a millisecond of hesitation I will jump in front of a Volvo to keep you safe, and I wouldn’t think twice about doing it again.
You have taught me that I am capable of doing all kinds of things at once without (completely) losing my mind- getting you a snack, while unloading the dishwasher, while cooking dinner, while checking homework, while re-building the Lego motorcycle, while telling you where you left your shoes.
You have taught me that I like Candyland so much better when you win.
You have taught me that it’s important, and necessary to abandon chores, errands, emails and my phone so we can play superheros at the park, or race scooters up and down the driveway.
You have taught me that finger prints on windows, dirt tracked across the floor, cracker crumbs on the carpet, plastic sharks haphazardly left in the tub, Hot Wheels cars strewn everywhere and grass-stained knees are the sign of a happy childhood.
You have taught me that with a little bit of encouragement from someone who loves you so much, you can accomplish anything. Like last week, when came with me on my run, and you rode your bike for 4 miles! Amazing! I was so proud! Or yesterday, when you wrote 2 sentences using 4 of your sight words. You are so smart!
You have taught me that no matter what I accomplish, I will always be prouder of your accomplishments.
You have taught me that I love and appreciate your dad, and all that he is, and all that he does so very much. He is hard-working, self-less and nurturing. And without him, there would be no you.
You have taught me patience and the art of breathing deeply.
You have taught me that holding grudges is silly. That forgiveness is a beautiful gift for both the other person as well as yourself.
You have taught me that while I have been helping to mold you into a kind, brave, compassionate person, you have actually been making me a better person.
You have taught me what it’s like to really feel. I didn’t know what it was like to experience extreme joy. To be paralyzed with fear. To be frustratingly frustrated. To beam with pride. And to love someone so much that their safety, happiness, and well-being would forever trump mine. And I don’t want to go back to a time where I don’t get to feel this gamut of emotion, every single day.
But most importantly, Adam, you have taught me that I can’t live without you. Even though I had been walking the earth for 29 years before your existence, it hasn’t been the same since you arrived. I had a great life before you were born, but it has been so much better since I became your mom.
When you become a parent, all the parenting books preach how much kids need their parents. But what they fail to mention is how much us parents need our kids. With the very first fluttery kick, to that tiny little newborn cry, to the first smile, the first “mama”, to the giant hugs, the I love you‘s, the games of pretend, the hand-drawn pictures and the good-bye mom’s on the first day of school, I discovered I would never be able to live with out you.
Adam, having you changed me. Having you made me want to be better. Having you taught me more than I ever learned in pre-mom years.
These past 6 years have been an amazing roller coaster ride. I’ve buckled in, and I’m ready for more up’s and down’s, turn’s and twists.
Thank you for being you. Thank you for being my son, my buddy, my student and my teacher. You definitely carry my heart in the palm of your hand.
Happy 6th Birthday Adam! I love you so dinosaur much!